What Are the Bennie’s?


Today on my morning run I was able to log in 6.62 miles. It’s a personal best for me so far.  I started running about three months ago.  I started running from my house to the local park which I estimate to be about one mile from my home.  I focused on either running to the park and then walking the rest of my normal trail. I have been an avid walker for over five years.  I believed as many other walkers that walking is better than running. I could list a number of reasons to support my thinking.

I used to run cross country in high school. I grew up in the northeast corner of Connecticut where our high school mascot was a mountaineer.  I loved running the mountain trails but I was not a fan of running it self. I still don’t think I love running, I just love the benefits or the “bennies” that it provides.

Thinking about it, the benefits of the things we do is what drives us to do them. It’s truly not the activity it self.  So when it comes to making changes in your lives, the one true question you first have to answer is, what is the benefit, or the bennie’s, I am getting out of this?  Without taking the time to reflect on each habit or change you want to make, it’s pointless without figuring out what it is that your are looking to gain or to eliminate.

Think about this as we bring 2019 to a close. Now is the time to reflect on what is working and what is not.  Design your life the way you want to, not by the opinions of others! What benefits are you looking to gain in the coming year?

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Show Up First


Show up authentically and synergy will meet you there. ― Sanjo Jendayi

I started running about three months ago.  I had been an avid walker for more that five years or more.  I really have no clue as to where this is taking me. I simply love being out in nature and it’s a great way for me to find clarity and creativity.

What inspired me to start running?  Well the same park I walk at is the same location that one of the local high school’s cross country team practices at.  I remember on one Sunday morning, I saw a young man out running in the cross country course by himself. Wow!! This young man didn’t wait until the coach told him to practice or the rest of the team to be there, he just went out and did it.

We don’t need to get other people’s approval to do and be who we are. It’s nice to have a cheering section but sometimes the fans won’t show up until we do.  What have you been wanting to do? Don’t wait, be like that young runner and go for it!

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Period of Transition


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“Only those who stick around long enough to see the caterpillar turn into the butterfly actually get to witness the transformation.” ― Kristin Michelle Elizabeth

I love this quote because it reminds me that there will be people in and out of your lives constantly.  I have been guilty of is worrying about those who didn’t stick around.  Let it go! The past is just that, the past.  Maybe, just maybe, their assignment was up and it was time for them, or you, to move on. Look for the blessing or the lesson and keep moving forward.

Worry about who isn’t in your life anymore, keeps us from appreciating those who are.  This is nothing but a “period of transition”. For those who did not stay around to witness your transformation, wish them good will and release any negativity that may have surrounded their departure.  Holding on to the negativity is like holding onto an anchor, it just holds you back. Everyone, including you are on our own journeys.  All we can ever do is just keep crawling until it’s time to grow your wings and fly!

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Stay on The Lookout

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Blessing are everywhere, you just have to stay on the look out for them.  There are countless miracles that go unnoticed everyday of every minute.  A couple of years ago I learned of just a tiny fraction of the blessing are bodies do for each of us.  For instance, if you exercise, your body has a built in cooling system that you do not have to program.  Your body can heal itself.  You have a build in counseling system consisting of the mind, body and soul.  You are literally a walking miracle each and everyday!

With that little knowledge alone my life shifted.  When your start to learn just how blessed you are to wake each morning with life,  you begin to notice those things in life that are taking up your energy and time.  You start to value your time and the time of others.

Time is our most precious commodity.  Take inventory of those things that not longer serve their purpose in your life.  Time is not promised to no one! Take inventory of your own unique gifts and talents and reflect on just how you can us those gifts to serve this world.  Remember: You are a blessing!

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It’s Not That Important


It’s not that Important” were the words being shouted from the backseat of the car the other day when my husband and I were “discussing” where to place the cell phone in order to hear the navigational directions.  I will admit that I got “caught up” in the discussion because I was trying to make my opinion known.  Of course my husband had his own idea on where he wanted to put the phone since he was driving.

My three year old granddaughter interjected herself into the conversation by saying “its not that important”.  The thing that caught my attention, besides this little person yelling from the backseat and the fact that she couldn’t quite say the word “important” was when I stopped to think about what was happening at that moment, she was right.  I had let my ego step in.

I laugh now because it took the words of a three year old to remind me that sometimes the little things we make the biggest fuss over are the little things that can begin to tear a relationship apart. The best thing we can do is stop, take a deep breath and ask yourself, just how important is it for me to be right?

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I Won the Jeep!

59720707_10218431886056543_4573895537492754432_oFor anyone who has followed my blogs over the past few years knows that I had an auto accident in 2013. It was a rainy Halloween night when I lost control of my BMW and hit the cement divider wall and totaled my car.  My BMW was my retirement gift to myself. My husband and I were going through some financial challenges at the time and my car was the only thing I refused to part with.

I remember the evening well because it was the beginning of my spiritual journey.  That night of the accident was when I first noticed the tiny whispers of the Universe.  As I sat in the back seat of the police car, I remember a calming presence within that was saying everything is going to be alright. I remember thinking “God, you have my attention now!”

Fast forward to 2019 and I am sitting in a huge convention center. My company is about to do a drawing for a 2019 Jeep Cherokee Trailhawk.  As I watch the tickets being mixed up, I am thinking my chances of winning is not looking good. There must have be thousands of pink raffle tickets being mixed up in the large clear rotating raffle drum. But I decided not to focus on that, instead I started thinking about how it would feel to be seated in the Jeep, taking in the new car smell.  I could hear them calling the numbers.  I started thinking, I’m still in the running as they called off the first four numbers. By the 6th number, I was thinking, the winning number is really close to one of my four tickets I had.  It wasn’t until they announced the name of the winner that it hit me…  I won!

I believe that the Universe is always speaking to us.  My accident in 2013 was a wake up call to what life is trying to get me to notice. I make it a practice to stay present and enjoy the beautiful blessing that surround me.  I know this post can not express the sheer gratitude, faith and appreciation I have for such a loving, generous, and supportive Life Force, but what I want to say is Thank you!


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The Path

38787826 - woman jeans and sneaker shoesIn life ,we can get so caught up in the opinions of others.  We worry that we are not doing the “right” thing. What I and so many others fail to recognize is what feels “right” to you is not always going to feel “right” for someone else.  That’s the beauty of life, because their life purpose or path is not for you and vice versa.

One of my favorite guided meditations is The 21 Day Meditation Challenge – The Energy of Attraction by Deepak Chopra and Oprah Winfrey.  It is on Day 16 – Trusting Nature where the Centering Thought is “Everyone’s spiritual path is perfect.” To me, it is a reminder that not everyone is meant to do what it is that you are here to do.  We are all here with our own divine purpose and mission.  It is up to us to determine what that purpose is.

What is the key factor  is we are only allotted so much time on this Earth to discover and live our purpose.  Time is the only precious resource that we can never get back.  So my point is this, don’t get so caught up in living someone else’s life.  Live your life purposefully. It’s the only one we have.

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Care to Dance?

Ballroom dance latin dancersI started taking salsa classes a few weeks ago.  It’s the type of salsa that requires working with a partner.  I am not usually the lead partner which has been a struggle for me.  They teach us the basic steps and then when we are partnered up, I am to “mirror” my partner. Last week we had a practice session. I learned one of the most valuable lessons, not only to dancing, but in life.

As one of the gentleman asked me to dance, I informed him that is was my first lesson. He smiled and we started to dance.  I focused on counting my steps and made lots of missteps and mistakes.  My partner smiled and told me to close my eyes. He said feel the rhythm and trust me.  I closed my eyes and I tried not to anticipate the steps I just listened to the beat and let my partner lead. It was so much fun! That’s when I understood:

“Life is the dancer and you are the dance.” -Eckhart Tolle

Maybe it is us who causes our own stumbles and missteps. Perhaps we need to learn to let go of our need for control, close our eyes and listen to the rhythm. Life is always asking you, “Care to Dance?”

Quote Source:  Eckhart Tolle Quote

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Creeping Through My List

Each year brings a new adventure. This year, I decided to recommit myself to my network marketing business.  Like many others, I associated negatively with network marketing. I never bothered to see if I was perhaps a contributing factor to past failures.

One of my goals has been to re-connect with people. I have been reaching out to people who are on my contact list to see if they are interested in coffee. This story is about a failed attempt.  Here’s what happened:

Me: Coffee, next week?
Woman: No
Me: Thank you
Woman: For what?
Me: I appreciate you responding back.
Woman: Who is this?
Me: Tonia Tyler
Woman: Who
Me (I thought I knew her): I used to manage you social media account when I worked with …
Now, I am trying to remember if this is a person I met back in my PR days, so I look at her FB page.
Me: Pure Romance?
Woman: How old are you?
By now, I realize I definitely got her confused with someone else.
Me: Never mind. I realize you don’t know me so please forget it.
Woman: Okay
Woman: You are a creeper (something along those lines)


I almost decided to respond, but then I just deleted our text conversation and her contact information. I was one of those people who use to collect business card and fail to follow up.  I know now that just because we don’t do business today, does not mean we might not do business later, if at all.  It’s not about how many names you have on a list, it’s about the friends you make from your opportunities.

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Have you ever come a cross a person and once you leave you notice the feelings or thoughts that remain after your encounter with them.  Like for instance you have people who bring up feeling of peace. you may have people who bring out the excitement of possibilities. We even have those people who are like hurricanes that stir up feeling of anxiety and chaos.  I call this, residue.

Like this we encounter, we also leave behind feeling and thoughts on others.  It wasn’t until I became more aware of my own conscious thoughts that I realize that we all are leaving a bit of ourselves everywhere we go.  We have the power to decide what kind of residue we want to leave others.  Granted, they may not always receive it as such.

I learned through meditation that we can set our intentions daily and choose to be either the lighthouse or the storm. What kind of residue due you want to leave? The kind that people enjoy or the kind that people want to wash off.

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