Game Change… I have the Power of Control.

All that we are is a result of what we have thought. – Buddha

Did you know that you are an energy source that attracts either positive or negative energy?25758381_s  Did you also know you can control how you say something, the way you say something and even when you say something?  What you cannot control is how someone will react, what someone thinks or what the other person is feeling. That thought alone has been the biggest game changer in my life.

For years, I heard Oprah say that when someone gets angry or mad at you, it really has nothing to do with you. She was absolutely right. My A-ha moment was when I realized that all you truly do is trigger an issue within them. How I learned was by working on my own issues. When I used to get mad, and after I realized I got mad, I asked myself, why is this bothering you? Many times, when someone said something, it was an issue that was weighing somewhere in the back of my mind and they just happened to “pick at it”.

For a long time, I used to get mad at my 22 year old daughter for buying new clothes. She works in a clothing store and on many occasions when I picked her up from work (key phrase…pick her up from work) she would either have a new bag, dress, shoes or something. I was getting tired of her lack of interest in getting her own license.  When I would “blow up”, I was actually frustrated with myself and feeling like I didn’t prepare her properly to move out and get her life together especially on the task of getting her own license. I felt like I let her down but instead of addressing my concern, I just got mad. I learn that it was her choice not to get her license, just like it was my choice to pick her up, or not from work.

Let me share with you a more recent issue where, I had to be more mindful in the choices I make. On my last trip from LA,DSCF6285-001 I had a layover in Dallas. The plane was late taking off in LA which of course would affect my time in Dallas.  When we arrived in Dallas, I had about 30 minutes to make my connecting flight. Low and behold, the plane was not able to pull into the gate because there was still another plane parked at it.  By the time we were parked and the gateway was in place, I had about 15 minutes to get off. By now, reality was setting in and there was a very high probability I wasn’t going to make my connecting flight.  Got off the plane had to go to another terminal and so, I knew I wasn’t going to make it in time. I missed my flight to LA just days before.  Got to the gate, boarding had ended.  I knew I wasn’t going to make it and I still got mad.  Here is where mindfulness played a big role in how I quickly was able to get a handle on my emotions.  I realized, I didn’t want to attract any negative attitude from the ticket agent. It wasn’t her fault I missed the plane but I needed her help to resolve my issue.  I was able to quickly get a hold of my anger. I realized by missing the flight, I had a chance to relax and grab something to eat before my next flight. I also took advantage of the yoga area. All things worked out. I had a pleasant flight into Cincinnati.

Most of the time, we can control our actions and reactions if we are willing to step back from the situation, breathe42155386_s and process what’s important.  Most of the time the situation is not really as bad as our minds makes it out to be.  Since, I have been able to put my game changing insight to work, my relationship with my daughter has also improved (despite the fact, she still doesn’t have her license). I know all things will work out in the end.

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About SwtNSocial

Loving life. Staying positive. Education, encouraging and empowering others. Using my creativity and enthusiasm to share ideas and thoughts to inspire others.
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